THE WAY THEY TWIST-follow-up to the senior pic saga he’s creating

twisted  There is no cure for the twisted way they manipulate and control and they know as good-hearted people, we will take things they say right to heart but what he isn’t counting on is that my heart towards him has changed 100%.  I no longer feel the need to care about what he thinks of me because even being the good person I am, he felt it was okay to treat me like the ground he walks on and it may have taken me a while, but I am now there.  The thing with me is I NEVER go back.  Once I am done, I am done.  I warned  him of that for years so that last time he walked out that door in an attempt to manipulate me and create the drama he craves, he expected to waltz right back in.  NOPE!

The latest email?  Telling me I am extorting money out of him because I want him to pay his part of the sitting fees for the senior pics and letting him know that it is my contract and if he tries to call the photographer, he will be referred back to me.

 

ex·tor·tion
ikˈstôrSH(ə)n/
noun
the practice of obtaining something, especially money, through force or threats.
You see, setting boundaries, is seen as extortion. A threat.  It’s a threat because he is not getting his own way.  It’s a threat because the only way he can obtain his goal is to abide by my rules but they’re not really my rules, they are the rules of the court that he thinks he can ignore when the whim hits him.  Again, it’s the narcissist’s small cubicle of a world that goes around and around to suit their needs and their needs only.
He might do what is right and pay his fair share but trust me, on the heels of it, will come something else that will need to be fought.  He won’t just do what is right.  He will pretend to do what is right and then hit me with something else.  I’m prepared.
Extortion.  pfft..my ass!
Blessings

 

4 thoughts on “THE WAY THEY TWIST-follow-up to the senior pic saga he’s creating

  1. I know right,😬. he is my husbands brother. If they aren’t having their way they start with the name calling & false accusations. I use to think my husband acted like a three year old trying to get his way. They believe boundaries are meant to be broken and will work hard at breaking them. I am no contact with my husband, my only living son is an adult so I don’t have to be., not until I get enough money to get an attorney. Then I know the battle is on, I will be ready for the fight of my life.

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    1. Ohh yes. They love to have someone else abuse you. I remember during our EBT my ex did not show up. It was a whole bunch of bullshit. Some stuff pulled of fb purposely planted there to see if someone else was watching my page since he was blocked. Yep! When I asked him why he didn’t come he said I couldn’t watch Esq. Do that to you. Aww. How caring and sympathetic but you approved it taking place. You will get through it. I did and I’ll be here when needed.
      .

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      1. They spend so much time trying to make sure that we don’t survive that they lose insight that their kids are our kids too & one day the kids will see who was doing what for them. My husband used other people to abuse me too, some of the stunts he would do to set me up was just unbelievable. Now when I see someone he used to abuse me with and they want to apologize I just smh. Another tactic my husband used was lying about me and on me, I caught him talking about me once to a neighbor & I was shocked. Later when he came in the house & I questioned him about it he acted as if I was crazy & he had know clue what I was talking about. Now that I think on it he played a lot little games & if I didn’t play according to his unspoken rules he would find away to make me pay. Everything was a game and now I’m not playing games. I’m using this time of no contact preparing for the battle, learning everything about him, he thinks I don’t know where he is I know his address, I know what it looks like in the apartment he shares with his new fuel. Though I can’t look at him without it triggering my anxiety. My brother has been collecting every picture of every event his new fuel post on Facebook. I’m not even sure he’s aware that his entire life is on Facebook since he abandoned me. All the trips and gifts he’s buying her. She is so in love and has to share it with everyone. I’m just taking care of me, its hard but I’m surviving, I’m getting stronger mentally and physically. When I get him in court I’m going in armored up wearing the Whole Armor of God, along with a complete file of photos showing how he lived large while I barely survived.
        Really your ex couldn’t watch the attorney do that to you what about all the shit he did personally to you and your kids. Little coward couldn’t watch, sure. They are good at doing things and hiding their dirty hands. I know I’m going to make it through this, its nice to communicate with someone who doesn’t think I need to just get over it & be glad he’s gone. I can’t & I won’t.
        Thanks for listening to all that. I’m here too when you need to vent or just need to communicate. The best part of telling our stories is the validation that it happened to someone else and not that it happened to me because there was something wrong with me, because I deserved it or I was just a “stupid as bitch”., my pet name he gave me.
        Okay, goodnight & thanks for listening.❤❤

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  2. Hey! I was a stupid bitch too! Just remember that she is you, however many years ago. He has her smitten and she probably has not started walking on egg shells yet. My ex tried to hide his new girlfriend. He never cheated. I wanted to know who was hanging with my kids so one day I researched it and found out who she was, who her parents were, where their cottage was, who was her ex, who her Mom remarried etc. He flipped a lid. Everything is such a secret. I just said, BOY! I did research for a living as a paralegal. You can’t hide from me. But you know what? She’s a very nice woman and I feel sorry for her. I will admit, that small victory of finding all that info out, was sweet satisfaction for me. Wait until she gets the letter I’m going to send her about this blog and our marriage. Girls have to look out for one another. She can stay with him…that his her choice but if he ever lays a hand on her, she can’t say i didn’t warn her.

    Yes, they all seem to have the same nuances and it is comforting to get validation that you are not alone in this world because people do want you to move on and forget the abuse because they cannot for the life of them fathom what it was like and how it happened every single day.

    Blessings.

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